Assalaamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh my lovelies!
I am here today to ask for some advice for a friend of mine. She feels stuck right now between trying to please her parents and trying to save her relationship with her boyfriend (she is non Muslim). The problem is that, although she loves her boyfriend and he loves her back, her parents do not want her with this man. Why? Well, they feel she is too good for him. I will copy and past what she has told me:
"my bf is a Godly man. no need to feel sad for me, i just need prayer and to find a way to get out of the house and be back on my own again. they do not approve b/c he is overweight (he has had gastric bypass) and does not have a college degree and i am working on my masters. they say i have dropped low. being that he is black, he is likely to leave me and since i will have a higher degree than he will, i will be his meal ticket. they just think the worst hence why we have to sneak around to see each other. i wish they would just try and take 5 min to get to know him. he is not the stereotype. thus far he says he will stay with me and is not going anywhere. i hope this is still true."
So if any one of you lovely ladies could kindly give your advice for her, it would be very much appreciated. She also mentioned her parents could possibly disown her if she stays with him. Also, let me clarify that he is African American and, although she is American as well, her family heritage is Nigerian.
I know you all have helped me through many difficult points and I am sure you can also help my dear friend :) JazakAllah Khair!
I love you all for the sake of Allah (swt).
~XoXo~
Elisa,
ReplyDeleteI am so sad to hear this but I understand because I have been through the same issues with the man that is now my husband. My family was not only disappointed because he was Muslim but mainly because he was Fisherman (and I have a Law Degree)and they thought he would use me only for money and to get what he wishes.
Anyway I would advise your friend to follow her heart, talk with her bf and see what is important for her.
Her parents are only trying to put pressure on her, as my therapist used to tell me, parents always dream of a perfect husband/wife for their children and when the one who comes is not the one they had envisaged they leave the disappointment takes all the place, without thinking about their children.
Keeping her in my prayers. All these situations make me sad cause it seems they will never end, people will never try to see past the stereotypes.
Take care Elisa. xxx
*That's great advice, Marie!! Thank you so much for your input. I know she will really appreciate it! God bless you dear and Lot's of love <3
ReplyDelete*Ah, yes. . .it may be a bit difficult to give advice from a non Muslim perspective, but your prayers are VERY much appreciated! Thank you sister. God bless you and Lot's of love <3
Istikharah.
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Hmmm her parents don’t know about her man that's why they are worried about her. She have to arrange long meetings between her BF and parent so they discuss each and every point those make her parents worried... :)
ReplyDeletevisit my blog--> Stay Blessed
they have chosen not to get to know him...which makes it hard and not easy on either party. keep praying for guidance and strength and understanding on all areas and with all individuals.
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